


Official SI intern

by PeterParkerFanboy



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Deaf Clint Barton, Deaf Peter Parker, Flash Thompson Bullies Peter Parker, Fluff and Angst, Inspired by Twitter, Multi, Out of Character May Parker, Protective Natasha Romanov, Protective Tony Stark, Sad Peter Parker, Trans Male Peter Parker, Trans Peter Parker, Twitter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:40:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 11,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25549093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeterParkerFanboy/pseuds/PeterParkerFanboy
Summary: Peter Parker gets a "professional" account for his internship.... Let's see how that goes.
Relationships: Harley Keener/Peter Parker, James "Rhodey" Rhodes/Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Natasha Romanov, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Peter Parker/Spider-Man (fake)
Comments: 183
Kudos: 854





	1. Chapter 1

SI @officalSI

New prosthetic arms! Give almost full motion. (Pictures of the new arms, feturing video of motion, and shows the color macthing to any skin tones) 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I have to publicly anouse almost all of this project was done by my personal intern. He did almost all of this by himself

My wife @leah

You have an intern?!?!? I thought you were aposed to that? 

Flash @seeyouina

Haha @pbp look at that your little secret is out as FAKE

MJ @imbusyreading

Shut up Eugene. 

Boats @hitmewitha

Hmm mm I wonder if hes hot

CanIGetA @waffle

Ooo smart little nerd boy. Sexy.

Stank @youknowwhoiam

We will be setting up a twitter account for him tomorrow as of the popular request. But please. No thirsting he is a minor!

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Please welcome @officalSIintern

Anxiety @officalSIintern

Hi world. how are you. Um. Yea. 

SaltnPep @PepperPotts

Honey you don't have to be so anxious. 

Anxiety @officalSIintern

Yes I do! I've had my account for 25 minutes and already have 16k followers!!!! That just sjfjsknsjde gonna jump off Stark towers

Neddle @NedFlanders

That'd be bad publicly,,,, so jump off oscorp instead :)

Anxiety @officalSIintern

Thanks for the advice bro! See y'all in hell

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

My intern is an anxious dumbass. 

DumbAss @officalSIintern

Hell yea I am. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Be professional! This represents the company. 

DumbAss @officalSIintern

Mr.Stank. I am Gen z i do not know the meaning of "professional" 

Flash @seeyouina

How old are you? SI only hires college level and higher. 

DumbAss @officalSIintern

I'm 15. 

My Wife @leah

Tony Stark hired a 15 year old?!?!? A 15 year old made a prosthetic!!!

DumbAss @officalSIintern

I'm getting a lot of negative comments on being to young… And a lot of creepy things… 

NR @blackwidow

For all of you sending bad things to a Minor! I will find you. 

Flash @seeyouina

That is impossible! A fucking highschool intern ha maybe another little liar like you @pbp

Peter Parkour @pbp

Flash. Just. Stop. I deal with this enough at school why do I have to online. 

Neddle @NedFlanders

Need me to come over pete?

Peter Parkour @pbp

If you wanna…. 


	2. Chapter 2

Why? @officalSIintern

All of you are saying I should do a QnA so #asktheintern ig

Nerd @vadar

Name? Howd you get an internship with Tony Stark so young? 

Why? @officalSIintern

Um. Not my real name just call me Junior? I made Spider-mans webs and his web shooters and Mr.Stark tracked me down. 

Cli(n)t @hawkeye

When are the hearing aids you made going on the market?

Why? @officalSIintern

You mean the permanent airpods i made???? Idk ask Mr.Stark

Needle @NedFlanders

Are you enjoying being modern day Hannah Montana? 

Why? @officalSIintern

Oml…. Im modern day hannah Montana. *sings really offkey* Get ThE bESt Of bOtH WoRLdS

<33 @brittanylikesbooks

How are you modern Hannah Montana??

Why? @officalSIintern

One life I'm a sad highschooler who constantly made fun of, and in other in Tony Starks personal intern! Which I'm still sad but its much cooler. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Do I need to get you a therapist?

Why? @officalSIintern

Maybe. QnA over Mr.Stark just landed on my roof. 

~~~

PeterParkour @pbp

Sometimes, life just gets worse and worse on the daily. Like wtf universe you couldn't stop at killing my parents? Just had to keep giving me the bad. 

Flash @seeyouina

Maybe if you stop all your lying the world would like you better. 

PeterParkour @pbp

I'm not lying flash. I had an internship. It's over now. I had one. 

Flash @seeyouina

You might not have lied about that but your lying to yourself on the daily. Right Penny?

Tony to Peter

T: you okay kid? 

T: Peter. Wanna come over? Work in the lab? 

P: yes please. 

T: alrifht. Its a Thursday so full weekend stay? 

P: of course. 

T: You remember that Harley kid??? 

P: yup

T: well hes coming up Tomorrow…. 

T: i promise it won't effect your stay tho

P:that's okay. I think just being out of my house will help. 

T: do i need to kidnap you? 

T: i will kidnap you. 

P:maybe. May is already pissed at me coming out as trans she'll flip when I say I'm gay. 

T: i will kidnap you.

P:its fine mr.stark

T: sure "fine" youre not slowly dying inside. 

P: yea u right

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so I love aunt may but I'm making her a total bitch cause plot lol


	3. Chapter 3

Panic! @officalSIintern

Haha when your legal guardian tells you your not a boy just a confused lesbian. I am a boy! Who likes boys! 

Needle @NedFlanders

Hey wrong account. 

Panic! @officalSIintern

Oh fuck. And already 15k retweets. @pepperpotts help me

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

Its okay honey. Text me or Tony. 

  
  
  


Pepper to Peter

Peter: hey Ms.Potts

Pep: are you okay? Anything bad happen?

Peter: Nope. Nothing. Everything is fine. 

Pep: okay. Tony bugged you apartment we'll just look at that. 

Peter: wth no! Its fine! 

_ 25 minutes later _

Pep: you were kicked out???

Pep: you had things thrown at you!

Pep: tony is tracking your location and picking you up. 

Peter: I'm fine… 

Peter: I'll get there myself.

Pep: already on his way. 

  
  


Dead @officalSIintern

When you accidentally tweet from the wrong account, get kicked out, mugged, and your boss(TonyStark) is now adopting you in one day. 

Flash @seeyouina

Reveal your identity. 

Dead @officalSIintern

No. 

~~~

  
  


DumbAss @officalSIintern

Its now Thursday. I am done with school for the week do to "stress" and Mr.Stark is taking me shopping. 

SIinternFan @stanyou

Ooo where??? We wannna see that face. 

DumbAss @officalSIintern

Not telling :) my face is  _ secret _

MJ @imbusyreading

It'll be so funny if anyone connects the dots. 

~~~

DeafNdumb @officalSIintern

I've been getting an alarming amount of questions if I'm deaf. Yes I am. I made myself some hearing aids that restore like 92% of my hearing and I made some for halwkass and they're bluetooth! So permanent airpods!

Cli(n)t @halwkeye

They're amazing. Best aids I've ever had. 

DeafnDumb @officalSIintern

Only problem is there bulky Mr.Stark, Dr.Banner and I are working on making them smaller. 

Cli(n)t @halwkeye

You're the smartest 15 year old ever. 

DeafnDumb @officalSIintern

Thank clit 

~~~

SuperHero @watch

Earlier today a boy was spotted heading into SI with Tony Stark. We didnt see the face but he has brown curls! Is this boy the mystery Junior? (Picture of Peter and Tony walking into stark tower, peter has his head sucked so you can't see his face)

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Don't take pictures if minors without permission. 

MJ @imbusyreading

Hmm looks like someone I know….

PeterParkour @pbp

I can feel the smirk in your face and I don't like it. 

Needle @NedFlanders

Dude text me. 

  
  


Peter to Ned

Peter:hey bro

Ned: dude what happened? Like I know some stuff but I'm worried about you man. 

Peter:so may found out I'm trans because of spiderman right? And she didn't really expect it. Mr.Stark got my name changed and stuff since they split custody me from the internship. 

Ned: alright I knew that. 

Peter: so may got mad when she found out my name was legally changed and told me I'm "just a confused lesbian"

Ned: but your not your a boy. 

Peter: may threw a lamp at me thank gods I have my spider-sense

Ned:wtf man you okay?

Peter: I don't remember the last time I was fully okay.

Peter: I love may…. But she doesn't love me. Mr.Stark is gonna get full custody. 

Ned: I love you man. Just remember I'm here for you. 

Peter:I know. Love you too bro. 

~~~

Harley to Tony

Harls: so even with the whole junior thing I'm still moving in right? 

Tony: of course. Just might be busy for a while

Harls: its fine. Just happy to be out of rose hill.

Tony: I bet. You'll meet "Junior" and everything. 

Tony: He's only 15 and has had a lot happen recently so he nice. 

Harls: i will be. I promise. 

Harls: i DO know how to be nice ya know

Tony: wait you do??? I didn't know that. 

Harls: ha ha ha so funny. 

  
  


PermanentAirpods @officalSIintern

Y'alllll when you get adopted by Tony Stark but can't even flex at school cause everyone hates you,,,,, mooood

JuniorStan @StarsWrite

Aww just know all of your fan base loves you and will protect you! 

PermanentAirpods @officalSIintern

Dont need protecting my new dad is ironman

Stank @youknowwhoiam

You think of me as a dad???? I'm a father figure????? Oml 

PermanentAirpods @officalSIintern

I mean,,,, yea

Rhodey @honeybear

Am I also a dad then??? 

PermanentAirpods @officalSIintern

Of course Rhodey!

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Does this mean you'll stop calling me Mr.Stark. and call me dad? Or at least Tony?

PermanentAirpods @officalSIintern

On my third set of parents. This ome better work out universe! 

Not inches @kilometer

Aww cutest family ever <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I fuckinf love twitter fics. And comments! Comment please???? They make me smiles <3333


	4. Chapter 4

DillionLuck5 @luckyluck

I just say a very tall boy walk into Stark Towers with Pepper Potts?????? @pepperpotts @youknowwhoiam @officalSIintern

Canthearyou @officalSIintern

Do people just stalk the main entrance??

JuniorStan @StarsWrite

Yes we do. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

That's just Harley. @potatoguns

Harls @potatoguns

Why are people literally so crazy? Hi. I'm Harley. I live there. Don't stalk me. 

My Wife @leah

Do you know who Junior is????

Harls @potatoguns

Yes. No I won't give his identity away. I'm not dumb. 

~~~

Peter to Harls

Peter:wanna order pizza??? Dad, Dad 2, and Pepper are all working. 

Harls: yes. Also who's dad 2???

Peter: Rhodey. 

Harls: makes sense.

Peter: can we watch a movie? Well we eat? I'm bored. 

Harls: Sure sounds fun also your a highschooler don't you have homework? 

Peter: nope. I finished it all. What ya wanna watch?? Also what kinda pizza you want? 

Harls: you can just come to the kitchen and we talk?

Peter: my hearing aids were bugging me. So,,,can't hear

Harls: i know asl dumbass. 

Peter: be right there. 

~~~

Hehe @officalSIintern

People knowing asl is hot. 

Harls @potatoguns

Glad you think I'm hot >:)

Hehe @officalSIintern

I did not say that! I said you knowing asl is hot. 

<3 @brittanylikesbooks

Wait,,,, how old is Harley???

Harls @potatoguns

I'm 17. Why? 

<3 @brittanylikesbooks

Just seeing if its legal to ship you and junior. 

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I checked twitter to see what my kids did today and see your all shipping them??? Like harior is an awful ship name so potatointern come on. 

Dad. No @officalSIintern

Dad. No. Stop giving the people ideas…. 

~~~

PeterParkour @pbp

My hearing aids are hurting my ears :(

Flash @seeyouina

Haha that's what you get for being a disabled deaf freak. 

PeterParkour @pbp

Alright. Thanks. 

~~~

Peter to Dad(tony)

Peter: can I skip highschool. 

Dad: you're definitely smart enough too. 

Peter: your my legal guardian. Do that for me. 

Dad: flash kid again??

Peter:yup.

~~~

PeterParkour @pbp

Just took all my exams foe the rest of highschool and all I have to say is Bye bitch I'm amazed I didnt kms well in you. (picture of Peter and Mr.Mortica, Peter is holding his diploma) 

Flash @seeyouina

How much did you have to pay for that? Pathetic. We all know little orphan boy is dumb as a rock.


	5. Chapter 5

FuckThis @officalSIintern

@youknowwhoiam @honeybear Dad? Pops? Ik your both on your phones at work and neither of you textes me back but I really wanna just reveal my identity. I need impulse control? 

Rhodey @honeybear

Umm @potatoguns you home? Can you make sure he's not dumb? 

Harls @potatoguns 

Sure. U in your room? Wanna go blow shit up? 

~~~

Peter to Harls

Peter: I'd rather not leave my room. and you not be in it. 

Harls: okay. I can respect that. But why? If you wanna answer

Peter:I don't wanna wear my binder. And I look gross. 

Harls: alright. Well just text. 

Peter: yay! Umm do you like star wars???

Harls: of course! I tried to make lightsabers once. Did not work. 

Peter: oo Shuri made light sabers! I can ask her how she did it and then we can do it! If it doesn't require Wakandian tech. Cause yea. 

Harls: you know Princess Shuri????

Peter: lol uea shes a weeb

Harls: interesting… 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

@officalSIintern just told me @shuri was a weeb. Just letting the world know. 

Hehe @officalSIintern 

She's a furry too! 

MemeQueen @shuri

You better shut your mouth white boy. 

Hehe @officalSIintern

Or what? Your highness 

MemeQueen @shuri 

I'm telaporting to your room bitch. 

Hehe @officalSIinter

Do it bitch I miss you. 

Hehe @officalSIintern

She did it!! @potatoguns come to my room. 

~~~

Peter to Harley

Peter:srsly come to my room I put my binder on. So yea. 

Harls: omw

~~

SuperNatural @busyxfangirling

Anyone actually respect @officalSIintern and don't care if he reveils his identity?? Nope??? Just me??? 

Bi-Derman @MagicallyMusical

I do! Junior can reveal his identity whenever he wants not everyone wants to live in the spotlight. 

~~~

Ew @officalSIintern

Dad and Pops just came threw the elevator well they were making out. Excuse me well I gauge out my eyeballs. 

Rhodey @officalSIintern

Excuse me for loving my husband. 

Harls @potatoguns

We don't wanna see it thoooo

MemeQueen @shuri

I think they're quite cute #ironhusbands

Harls @potatoguns 

Ewwww Shuri no. 

~~~

Sad boi @officalSIintern

Its sad boy hours.

Sad boi @officalSIintern

Dysphoria is a bitch. Bully's are shit. I wanna just tell the world who I am to rub it in one person face. 

Harls @potatoguns

Do you need company? We can watch how I met your mother. And eat ramen. 

Sad boi @officalSIintern

Harls you're an angel. 

~~~

Less sad @officalSIintern

Harls and I went to go to tgw moviw room, and fucking Dad and Pops are making out! They're worse then teenagers! 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Sorry for loving my husband. 

Harls @potatoguns

Your both like 50! Stop acting like teenagers. 

Rhodey @honeybear

We gotra stay young somehow. 

~~~

Peter to Pepper

Peter: srsly can I reveal my identity?

Peter: asking cauze PR

Pepper: I knew you we're favorite for a reason. 

Pepper: tell me your plan? 

Peter:just post a video with me off screen like "hey this is official SI intern or Junior. Well technically my name is peter.- walk in sit- hello world. I'm peter parker! Or @pbp"

Pepper: I'll need two weeks to make sure we are both prepared. Plus gives you some time for it you really want.this. 

Peter: thank pepper!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo petes gonna reveil his identify??? Im loving all the comments!!!!


	6. Chapter 6

No. @officalSIintern

Anyone wanna give me directions to the nearest bridge? Or I could just take a swim in the hudson again. 

NR @spidermom

I'm leaving a mission RN you need time with your spidermama 

No. @officalSIintern

I'm fine Nat. 

NR @spidermom

Don't care. Cuddles, movies, ice cream, talking about possible crushes?? *wink wink*

No. @officalSIintern

Ig that sounds amazing… Thank you Spidermama. 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

Natasha(BLACK WIDOW) wasn't lying when she said she's coming for Junior They kicked me out of the living room :(

Suck it @officalSIinten

We're talking about boys. And I'm braiding her hair. And I might paint Nats nails. Do you really wanna be around for that?

Harls @potatoguns

I'm gay! I could come talk about boys too :(

Suck it @officalSIintern

Maybe next time. Its me and spidermama day. 

Harls @potatoguns

Fine. But I totally want a day where you paint my nails and we eat ice cream. 

Suck it @officalSIintern

Yes!!!

NR @spidermom

Get off your phone. Let's talk boys. 

~~~

07 @Fallenstar07

Still waiting for junior to release tho hearing aids :) like yus

Gander @Ander

Junior seems very smart for being literally 15! 

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Someone, not naming names, is gonna turn 16 in 5 days. 

Rhodey @honeybear 

You might not wanna name names. But I will! Its our son. Junior. 

MJ @imbusyreading

Hmmm same birthday as someone else we know…. Wonder who??? Any connections to… Be made?

Peter to MJ

Peter:don't reveal my identity beforw I do!

MJ: I won't. No one is smart enough to figure it out. 

Peter: yea well. Still its happening like,,, 3 days after my birthday.

MJ: im invited to the party right?

Peter: party? 

MJ: you're turning 16 your not having a sweet 16?

Peter: hell no.

Peter: just the avengers, Pep, you Ned and Harls. 

MJ: ooo Harls??

Peter: what about it?

MJ: id say someone has a crush???

Peter: whhhaaat? Noooo

MJ: so that's a yes. 

Peter: but he's so cool! He'll never like me back. 

MJ: im sure he will. 

~~~

PeterParkour @pbp

When you love and also hate your friends. @imbusyreadin @NedFlanders

Needle @NedFlanders

Love you too bro. 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

Junior and I are going shopping to get cool stuffs for my room :) (picture of there shoes, since they can't show there faces, Harley I wearing black doc martins with black laces, and Peter has blue sneakers with red tips and laces) 

Excite @officalSIintern

I'm so excited!!! And after we do that were gonna get chicky nug nugs

Harls @potatoguns

Of course darlin

~~~

Peter and Harley took off in one of Tony's less flashy cars. Still Stark tech but just plain black with a lot of space to put the things they're buying. 

"First stop. IKEA." Harley told Peter. 

Once they got there they fucked around. Acted like teenage boys. "Whats on the list today Harls?" Peter asked. 

"I need a large ass desk like, huge. Suplys for the desk. Ya know pens and shit. Um. I need some shelves. To put ma potato guns on. And um. Cooler bed sheets. Cause the one Tony had on the bed are just brown. And boring. "

"I'll be honest I got like half of that. But lead the way I guess." Peter smiled at him. Harleys hair was messy and he talked largly with his hands. Which completely drew Peters attention. 

They wonderd and goofed off well getting the things on Harleys list. They were looking for -well something- and suddenly Peters hearing just slowly and slowly stopped. 

Peter tapped Harls on the shoulder to get his attention. 'My fucking aids died' he signed at him. 

'Do you have batteries?' The taller signed back.

'At home.' Peter sighed, he hated when this happened. Going from hearing to not all at once was annoying, and honestly pretty scary. 

'Okay. Well wanna check out get the rest later? And go home?' 

'I want Chicken Nuggets.' 

~~~

DumbDeaf @officalSIintern

My aids just died well shopping and I left the batteries at home like a dumb. 

Harls @potatoguns

But he still wants to go get chicken nuggets. 

DumbDeaf @officalSIintern

Well duh.

~~~

Peter and Harley walked into the McDonald's because 'ordering inside and then eating in the car is way better. Trust me'

They stood and waited for their orders to be done and Peter Luck struck again. Flash and his goons. "Oh god." Peter mumbled under his breath. 

"Well. Looks like the little orphan girl got herself a boyfriend. Huh dipshit?" Flash taunts. 

'I can't fucking hear jackass.' Peter signed at Flash hoping he'd go away. It only made him laugh. 

"Just leave. Or go stand over there? I don't want to do deal with this." Harley told the group well rolling his eyes. 

"Aww gotta protect your little girlfr-" POW Harley punched Flash square in the nose. 

"You'll pay for this! My dad is rich! He'll hire the best lawyers and we're gonna a sue you!" Flashed whined just like Draco Malfoy. 

"Have fun with that." Harley smiled. And signed 'reveal?' At Peter. Peter gave a small nod. "And I'm sure the best lawyers will be with Peters Dads and Me if you sue. His dad is Tony Stark. And I'm potato guns or Harley Kenner. Now we're leaving. Our order is reading. Have a shit life." With that Harley lightly grabbed Peters wrist and they got their food and left. 

~~~

Wow @officalSIintern

We go to get chicky nugs. Harls punched a bully of mine. We reveal my identity to him. And I also got a milkshake! 

Rhodey @honeybear

I'm sorry what?


	7. Chapter 7

Flash @seemeina

@pbp I refuse to believe it. 

PeterParkour @pbp

Well. Believe what you want ig. 

MJ @imbusyreading

Just post on your other account already. 

~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

Hi world. So like. Identify reveal?? 

(Picture of Peter, wearing a large SI hoodie,its Tony's, with a giant poof of curls and a small smile.)

Flash @seeyouina

F u c k

Flash @seeyouina

I'm so sorry peter…. For like everything. 

Peter @officalSIintern

Press (X) to doubt. Youre only sorry cause my dads are iron man and war machine. 

Eep@FloofyTMCCWritez

Aww hes so cute :)

<33@swimmerwimmer

Can someone hunt down his personal???

GreenIsCreate@Thegreenpotatebean

I found it its @pbp

~~~

PeterParkour @pbp

Y'all hungry down my personal… Enjoy the shit posts ig. 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

He's so cute. (Video of peter getting ready he's singing "time to go to ballet. Time to go to ballet. Time to go to ballet. To learn some cool dance moves." To the time of we just a letter from blues clues.)

Stank @youknowwhoiam

He does that for everything! Its so cute. Personal favorite? Time to clean the wrenches. ( Peter singing and swaying "time to clean the wrenches. Time to clean the wrenches. Time to clean the wrenches. So they nice and shine." Tony buts in. "That's not proper grammar." )

Rhodey @honeybear

This is my favorite. ( Peter singing, yet again, "time to go to therapy. Time to go to therapy. Time to go to therapy. To work on mental health.)

Wow. @officalSIintern

I expect this from dad and Pops. Embarrassing me online. But Harls. I trusted you. 

Harls @potatoguns

Dramatic. 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

I am concerned….. @youknowwhoiam text me back. 

Rhodey @honeybear

What's up? Tonys in a meeting and Pepper took his phone. 

Harls @potatoguns

Spiderman is passed on on the couch. 

Rhodey @honeybear

I'll text you. 

Rhodey to Harls

Rhodey: alright so just leave him be for now. He's going to need ALOT of food when he wakes up okay? 

Harls: alright I guess. Should I make or buy food?

Rhodey: just wait a bit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I should tell y'all most of my ideas for this book come from my beautiful girlfriend Leah. And I she deserves the credit. Love you babe <333


	8. Chapter 8

"Spider-man. You need to wake up. You have been asleep for 2 hours and have a minor concussion." Fridays voice rang out in the living room spiking fear is Harley.  _ He's injured??? Why didn't I fucking check that.  _

"Ughhh. That fucking hurts." He grabs his head in pain. 

"Um. Fuck. I know your voice. I know your voice. Fuck…." Harley paused making the connection. "PETER?" 

"Ughhh. Harlsssss. My head hurts. Voice down… Fuck. IM in SUIT?" 

Peter jumps up, going to run to change, and immediately falls flat on his face. 

"Pete. Let me help you up." Harley picked the smaller boy up and set him back on the couch. 

Peter pulled his mask off. "Why cant I keep a secret! Like your the fifth person who figured out!" 

"My room is right next hour I'd figure out eventually!" 

The elevator doors opened at some point during their conversation. "I really thought you knew how to keep secrets Pete." Rhodey told him shaking his head, making tony burst out with laughter. 

"You thought Pete could keep a secret?" Tony hardly managed to get out in-between laughing. 

"Daaaaad"

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

I convinced Spider-man to get twitter :)

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Hello internet. 

My wife @leah

Does Spider-man is gay????

Spidey @Spider-Pan

No but he sure does Pan. 

~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

Ughhhhh I hate having crushes. He's gay. I'm Pan. We could date. But he's so perfect :(((( he'd never like me eee

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Mood Peter. Mood. 

Flash @seeyouina

OMG Spider-man I'm your biggest fan!!!! You crashed my car remember????

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Yes! You're a dick to my friends and I don't regret crashing it :) 

~~~

Two nerds + MJ

MJ: when are you going to do something about.your crush on Harley?

Peter: Never. 

Peter: I'm going to Pine forever.

Ned: omg peter your so dramatic!

Peter:I knoowwww

Peter: :(

Peter: hes just so perfect. 

MJ: we still havent met him. 

Peter:come over and do it then. 

Ned: really????

Peter:just asked Pops he says its cools. Come over.

~~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

My friends came over :) @NedFlanders @imbusyreading (a selfie of the three. Need and Peter have giant grins and look super excited and happy. MJ had a blamk face towards the camera. You can tell from her eyes she happy tho.)

Harls @potatoguns

They're all building Lego's and I wasn't invited :((( (pictures of the three sitting on the floor with many piles of Lego's surrounding them. 

MJ @imbusyreading

Come join us loser. 

Needle @NedFlanders

He's been sulking in a corner. 

~~~~

MJ @imbusyreading

#ishipit #potatointern (picture of Peter anf Harley looking at each other laughing) 

Peter @officalSIintern

MJ!!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My dogs are annoying and I wanna hug my girlfriendm butt noooooo she lives to far away


	9. Chapter 9

Spidey @Spider-Pan

I love swinging around new York! Totally takes your mind off the guy your pining after BTW. 

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Ugh. I hate villians. Fucking vulture wanna be. 

Spidey @Spider-Pan

And the actual vulture. Broke out. Go me. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I'm on my way. Stay safe. 

~~~

Two losers + MJ

Peter: how do I get Harley to date me

MJ: make him jealous

Ned: fake date Spider-man! Then hell get jealous of you dating someone. 

Peter: he knows I'm Spider-man!

MJ: of course he does. You suck at secrets. 

Peter: :(

MJ: fake date ned?

Ned: no thank you. 

Peter: no.

Peter: sorry ned but just no. 

MJ: welp. Im going to make a sparker post anyway. 

Peter: sparker?

MJ: Spider-man + Peter. 

~~~

MJ @imbusyreading

I know I made a #potatointern post…. But #sparker (picture of peter and Spider-man cuddling. Its very well Photoshopped) 

Peter @officalSIintren

MJ!!!! I told you no!!!! 

~~~

NR @blackwidow

My own Peter. My child. Keeping secrets from you Mama. You never told me you to finally got together!

Peter @officalSIintern

Moooom. Why must you do this to me :(

Spidey @Spider-Pan

So much for secrets. 

~~~

Two Losers +MJ

Peter: Ned you hacked my account!

Ned: :)

Peter: ughhhhh

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Guess I can post this? ( a very impressive photoshop job of Spiderman and Peter kissing. His masked lifted to his nose. Both in different science pun tops.) 

Peter @officalSIintern

Ugbakzjnsjak 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

My kids are dumbasses. How tf did you manage this? 

Rhodey @honeybear

Tones. Be nice. I'm a little upset that Peter told the internet before us tho. 

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

This is a PR nightmare. Everyone off your phones. 

Peter @officalSIintern

But Mom! Tiktok! 

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

Give your phone RN. 

~~~

Needle @NedFlanders

Honestly. Peter has 2 moms and 2 dads and I've never been more jealous. 3 of them are superheros. And the Last is a business goddess. 

Peter @officalSIintern

Haha I love it :) the universe is finally being good to me. 

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

I currently have your phone? 

Peter @officalSIintern

Yes. I made a new one. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

In 35 minutes???

Peter @officalSIintern

Yes. I need Tiktok. And to text people.

Harls @potatoguns

Like your boyfriend *eyeroll*

~~~

Two Losers +MJ

Peter: Harls seems mad…. 

MJ: hes prob jealous. 

Peter: I don't like it :(

Ned: ask him about it. 

Peter: love you ned

Peter: gonna text him. 

MJ: text your boy crush. 

Peter to Harls

Peter: you okay? 

Peter: you haven't said much on the whole me dating me thing.

Harls: yea im fine. Some personal stuff. 

Harls: im gonna go on a walk. 

Peter: its dark out. 

Harls: ive got my watch.

Harls: don't wosjkdoejwk

Peter: Harley?

Peter:Harls??

Peter: oh fuck. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I original? No not at all. But let's see how this goes :)


	10. Chapter 10

"Fuck. Fuck! Dad. Hurry up on your trackering!" Peter was paceing back and forth on the ceiling. 

"Peter. Baby. Honey. Just get down. Come here." Rhodey was telling him. 

Peter crawled down to sit in his Pops lap to get comforted. Rhodey pet his hair, played with his curls. "We'll get him. I promise. See. Dads almost.got his location. Keep calm. I know you want your best friend safe." 

~~~

Harley had passed out. Some sort of chemical, bad over his head. All a very stereotypical kidnapping. 

He woke up feeling foggy, he was in a basic room. A cheesy mattress in a corner on the floor, a sink and toilet on the other side of the room.  _ Fuck. I'm going to die. I'm going to die here. Why cant I feel my leg? Just breathe Harley. Breathe. _

He looked around his surroundings in good detail. The walls are cracked. Broken. The sink is leaky. The bed is stained with blood.  _ Fuck thats why I can't feel my leg.  _ Multiple bones were sticking through the skin. "Fuck." He whispers to himself.

_ My watch! Its still on. Just press the panic button.  _

~~~

"Someone pressed the panic button! We have his location! Peter, youre staying here. Your to emotional for this right now. Natasha will come be with you. Friday get Natasha. Rhodey suit up." He kissed peter on the forehead. "I love you son. We'll be back soon. Friday get MedBay ready. " 

Peter was moved from Rhodeys lap to Natashas. 

"Do you think he'll be okay mama?" Peter asks Nat. 

"Of course my паук малыш(spider baby)." 

~~~

Harley was put in surgery as soon as he returned. The kidnappers were arrested. And yet again. Peter paced on the ceiling. "He's almost out of surgery. He probably won't be awake for a while tho." Tony tells Peter. "Please get down you scare me up there." 

"I'm part spider dad. It comforts me."

~~~

Harleys actually was doing pretty good considering. The torn skin was fixed because Helen Cho is amazing, the bones are all back in place, he'll just need to stay in Med Bay for 7 days minimum. 

Peter and Tony were the first people he saw who weren't doctors. "Did you call Abby?" Was the first thing he said to them. 

"Yes we called you folks. Abby's coming up tomorrow. Happy is gonna get her." Tony told him. 

"Good good. Ma's not coming?" 

"No. She said she's to busy. " 

"Of course to busy to see her son." 

Well Harley and Tony had a talk Peter made himself a web cocoon.  _ I am not planning on being anywhere else. I need to comfort him. Or the other way around. Either way.  _

"Peter, Harley. I'm gonna head out. Peter. Take your binder and hearing aids out. Harley. Don't move to much. I love you both." 

Peter jumped down and hugged his father before going and sitting next to Harley. "Hey Harls. You scared the shit out of me." Peter told him. Which made Harls chuckle. "I'm never let you go anywhere alone again." 

"Alright. Come here." Harley moved over and patted the space next to him. "Wait. Binder off. Then come here." 

Peter sighed. Stood up turned around and took off his(Tony's) shirt off, "your so pale." Harley told him. 

"Don't look!" 

Peter shimmied out of his binder,put his shirt back on and cuddled with Harley.

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Harley is back home safe. Scariest 7 hours I've dealt with in a long time. I think it's safe to say Peter missed him. (Picture of Harley and Peter cuddling in the hospital bed)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do y'all think? Domt be rude. But I want feedback :)


	11. Chapter 11

Harls @potatoguns

Peter hasn't left my side in 5 days. He set up a bed in my hospital room! 

Abbs @abbykeener

Not even I'm asking protective over you and we share blood. 

Harls @potatoguns

Wooow. I basically raise my younger sister and she cares less then someone I've known for a year.

Abbs @abbykeener

Dramatic. 

Harls @potatoguns

I have my reasons. 

~~~

Rhodey @honeybear

The kids are so cute. (Abby and Peter sitting on either sides of Harley.) 

Memequeen @shuri

I'm coming to see Harley. Idk if Tony told you. 

Rhodey @honeybear

He did. Safe travels Princess. 

~~~

Harls to Mama

Harls: i miss you mama

Harls: i wish you would've came. 

Harls: abbs says you got a new boyfriend. 

Harls: she also said that he's a dick. 

Mama: i didn't raise you to say stuff like that.

Harls: you didn't raise me! Or Abby! I raised her and myself! 

Mama: fine then keep her. 

Harls: fine. Youll have to sign paperwork. 

Mama: just send it over. 

~~

"So Abby? How would you feel about staying here at the tower?" Harley asked her. Abby and Peter both looked confused. 

"Mama doesn't want me back?" Abby looked confused and sad. A soft sigh left her lips. "Is it sad that I'm not surprised?" 

"I told her that I missed her and she got all. Ya know how she gets." Harley told her. 

Peter quietly left the room. This seems like a family thing that I am not involved in. 

"I like you more anyway. House smells like pot without you there. And I missed you." Abby gives a small smile at her older brother. 

"Oh god. I'm 17. And I'm going to be in charge of a 13 year old. I need to tell Tony." Abby laughs at her older brother. 

~~~

Harls to Tony

Harls: i want custody of Abby. 

Harls: i can legally do that right?

Tony: idk your only 17

Harls: but I got emancipated so I could live alone. So I think it is?

Tony: pepper is getting paper work. 

Harls: good good. 

~~~

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

The boys are so much work. Peters all "haha I revealed my boyfriend to the world have fun with that." And Harley is all "I got kidnapped and now get me adoption papers." 

Nerd @vader

Wait…..adoption papers????

Harls @potatoguns

Wow Pepper. Tell my secrets. I'm taking custody of my little sister. 

Abbs @abbykeener

Hell yea you are :) 

Harls @potatoguns

You're 13! No swearing. 

Abbs @abbykeener

Really taking on the fatherly role. 

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

People ACTUALLY write fanfics about my boyfriend and Harley. And APPARENTLY I shouldn't send them to them. 

Peter @officalSIintern

They also write fanfics about us babe. 

Spidey @Spider-Pan

They also write fanfics about Mamma Spider and Uncle Clint. 

Cli(n)t @halwkeye

Wait. What? 

Spidey @officalSIintern

And like none of them include you being deaf. 

NR @blackwidow

Does that world not know I'm a raging lesbian??? In a relationship with a women?

Peter @officalSIintern 

Apparently not. 

Harls @potatoguns

I asked for water 15 minutes ago people!!!! Y'all told me I'm not allowed up yet

Peter @officalSIintern

Be right there oof sorry. 

~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

I think Abby is my favorite out of the Keeners. She'll actually build Lego's with me :P

Harls @potatoguns

But you gotta admit I'm hotter. 

Peter @officalSIintern

Fair. Fair. You're really gonna take good care of her. 

Harls @potatoguns 

I am aware :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next few chapters mifht be good? Or might suck asss we'll seeeee


	12. Chapter 12

Stank @youknowwhoiam

My sweet little potato deserves more fan accounts. He turns 18 in ONE week and is a stay at home dad. Make me some fan accounts!

Harls @potatoguns

Ommmggg Toooonnnnnyyyyy

Abbs @abbykeener

No I agree make my brother more fan accounts! 

Peter @officalSIintern 

I'm making one RN. Harls is amazing. 

Keener @HarlsStan

I made one Dad! (Its me Peter!)

Harls @potatoguns

Peeettttteeerrrrr nooooooo

Keener @HarlsStan

Harley made the Iron Spider suit with almost no help! And he's built and iron man suit from memory! Love on Harls mooorre

~~~

my wife @leah

Does Tony like all your friends??? @officalSIintern

Peter @officalSIintern

He does. He SAYS he doesn't like Harry but I have proof that he does. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I do not like Harry. He's an OSBORN i could never like him. 

Harry @notosborn

Hmm. Reallyyy? (Picture of Tony holding harry at the airport.) This is him getting me at the airport. (Harry cuddled into Tony's side, harry had been crying) this is when my dad got arrested. (Text message from 'daddy Stark to Harry Daddy Stark: I love you Harry.) Proof? 

Rhodey @honeybear

God I think Harry and MJ are Tonys favorites 

MJ @imbusyreading

As it should be. 

Needle @NedFlanders

Why am I not a favorite :( 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

You hacked Spider-mans suit! And put him I'm danger! Hes 16! Hes need protection! 

Spidey @Spider-Pan

No I don't :( 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

I'm gonna be a legal adult in 3 days and I am not ready. How do taxes work? 

Harls @potatoguns

Man…. I really shouldn't have dropped out of high school… 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Hmm I wonder you told you not to in the first place? 

Harls @potatoguns

Shut it old man.

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

For Harleys birthday Mr.Stark got him (and peter and me) a lab! For ourselves! And like sjfjowoaoaj

Peter @officalSIintern

You included you? Why? You legit just blow stuff up or watch cosplayers on tiktok in the lab. 

Harls @potatoguns

And he makes those gross web nests everywhere. 

Peter @officalSIintern

He can't help those :( He's like 60% spider. 

Spidey @Spider-Pan

My boyfriend attacks and then defends me. What is this feeling? 

NR @blackwidow

That feeling should stay in the bedroom. 

~~~

Rhodey @honeybear

Its Harleys birthday!!! (Picture of Harley smiling wide a cupcake with purple,his favorate colors, icing a single white candle.

Harls @potatoguns

Wtf #happybirthdayharls is number 1 world wide?????

Stank @youknowwhoiam 

Of course it is! We want you to have an amazing birthday. 

~~~

Rhodey @honeybear

Steve and Bucky made enough food to feed a country. 

Jesus @buckybarnes

I mean 3 super metabolisms. And 2 gods

My wife @leah

3 super metabolisms??? You, Steve, and????

Spidey @Spider-Pan

And me! And Peter has just as large an appetite. 

Peter @officalSIintern

I'm a growing boy! 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

A growing boy on testosterone. Who I have seen out eat Captian America. 

Peter @officalSIintern

Exactly. A growing boy. 

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Harls opening Abbys gift (a video of Harley opening his gifts. "So who's present are you opening?" Tony asks

"Abby's." Its a purple gift bag he pulled out a frame of younger him(5) holding a new born Abby. "Aww Ma said we didn't have any baby pictures?"

"Dad burned most of em. But I found this one." 

"I love ya Abbs." ) 

~~~

The day was going good. Amazing well. The best Birthday Harley had in a long time. Surrounded by loved ones, and friends, he got to meet Natasha Romanov of course he was happy! Until. Fridays voice rang out. 

"Intruder Alert. Intruder Alert."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is shorter then I wanted it to be but I went to a wedding today and those are always so long and yeaa so shorter chapter. I'm sorry!


	13. Chapter 13

"Intruder Alert. Intruder Alert."

Tony's nano suit formed around his body. "I'm gonna go check this out. Everyone just stay here. Eat some cake. Friday will tell you if I need anything." Tony's faceplate was up here walked out, but not before kissing Peter and Harley on the top of there heads and Rhodeys cheek. 

~~~

Friday instructed Tony to wear the intruder was. They were on the move, and seeming to be fast. 

Tony made his way there carefully because this is his home, he can't destroy it. 

~~~

Back in the penthouse Harley is sitting close to Abby. Worried about whats going on. Everyone acted like it was okay and everything is fine. But everyone was anxious. 

"Okay how about a little distraction?" Pepper tell them. "Um. A movie? Whats your favorite movie Harls?" 

"Can we watch golden girls?" 

"Of course. Fri you heard it. Put it on." 

The group moved so they were huddled around the TV on furniture or the floor. Rhodey was cuddling up with Harley, he knew the kid was anxious and wanted to help. Peter tried his best to calm his nerves. But  _ that's my dad. My dad is fighting some unknown threat.  _ He made a web nest and tried his best to calm his nerves. 

"Peter. Really?" Natasha asked. 

"Helps calm the anxiety." Peter mumbles out getting comfy in his web. 

"Its not Pete's fault he's over half spider." Rhodey told everyone, Smiling up at his son. 

~~~

Tony lifted his face plate. "Macy? What's going on?" The Keeners Mom stood over a passed out body. 

"You! You stole my kids! Made them hate me." 

"Hey wait. No. They love you so much. But you pushed them out. You're welcome to come join the party upstairs." 

~~~

"Boss has been hit with a drug I cannot determine. He has been dragged out of the building "

"Fri. Connect to Karen. " Peter screamed his nano suit forming to his body as he broke the window and flung out. "Okay do you have location on him?" 

"Yes showing you directions know." 

Peter swung as fast as he could go get to his dad.  _ A white van. So stereotypical.  _ He followed until they got to a warehouse.  _ Oh my gods everything cliche in the book huh?  _

~~~

"Karen call for a car. And tell Friday Dad is safe. Ready Med bay." Peter sighs and sits next to Tony his dad. Tony's suit had been somehow destroyed. "Oh and call the police. Tell them everything. Everyone is webbed with the extra strength webs. "

"Of course Peter. " 

~~~

SI official @officalSI

Before the News goes a make a bigger story of this. Tony was Kidnapped. Spider-man Saved him. Everyone is okay. No one died. 

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

Very blunt and straight forward. Who runs this account? 

Catharina @Catharina2003

I do Ma'am

~~~

LokiStan @hela_spawn_of_loki

I cant believe Tony got kidnapped again. This must be so bad for his PTSD 

KittyCat @CyberSleuthCat

Oh gods I didn't think of that! 

DragonsRcool @goosethedragon

All on Harleys birthday

GayRights @gay_motherfucker

Honestly poor kids. Harls is still injured from his kidnappings. Pete's dad got kidnapped. 

iHaveFEELINGS @theFEELS

I hope all the kiddos are doing well :(

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

Birthdays suck. 

Abbs @abbykeener

I 100% agree. 

Peter @officalSIintern

I also agree. 

Rhodey @honeybear

Cmon kiddos. Tony is waking up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In an exact quote of my girlfriend "I love kidnappings."   
> I got a bank account today! I'm gonna start selling my art and stuff anf I'm so excited! What do y'all think the chapter????


	14. Chapter 14

Tony opened his eyes to see everyone he loved. His lovely husband, his handsome son, his unofficial adopted kids that he loved so dearly, but he was confused. "Wh-What happened?" The last he remembered was Macy yelling at him.

"You got drugged Tony." Rhodey told him. "I don't know much of what actually happened. You were taken. Peter saved you."

Peter jumped at the mention of his name. "Pete. Come here. Thank you baby." Tony tells his so, he kissed and forehead and pulled him up next to him on the bed. "Harls. Abbs. Come join." Tony tells them. 

~~~

Rhodey @honeybear

The kids are always stealing my cuddles. (Picture of the three kids laying with Tony. Peter is laying on him, head on Tonys chest, head tilted his bright red hearing aids extremely visable. Abby is on one side with Tony's arm wrapped around her, her hair is a mess it looks like its tickling Tony's nose. Harley the same position on the other side, his dirty blonde curls everywhere.) 

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

They all love tony so much. 

NR @blackwidow

There all so cute and sweet we all owe thanks to Spider-boy. Tony is a member of this family and we wouldn't be the same without him. 

Bucky @jesus 

We've trained our Spider baby well. 

~~~

Cli(n)t @hawkeye

Spider-boy in his natural habitat. (Picture of Peter in pajamas, mask on, in a large web hammock hanging from the ceiling) 

Spidey @Spidey-Pan

I need to keep watch on Mr.Stark and comfort Peter, Harls and Abby. And they took all the space on the bed!!!! 

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I would like to say that I am fine. I'm in tip top shape. And Peter really has some lungs! He yelled at me so much. 

Peter @officalSIintern

You need to not be kidnapped! I can't have more people die around me 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I know Petey. Come cuddle with me and Pops 

Peter @officalSIintern

Coming. 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

Natasha Romanov is a big ol softie. 

1D @Hazpaintslou

The spy???

Harls @potatoguns

Yes. She made me a bunch of southern dishes for my birthday. 

NR @blackwidow

Don't expose me keener

Harls @potatoguns 

To late softie. 

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Can someone convince Peter that I am fine! Im not injured. I don't need to be on bed rest. I miss my bots. 

Peter @officalSIintern

I'll bring up Dum-e, butterfingers, and U

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I wanna go to the lab!

Peter @officalSIintern

Don't make me get Spidey to web you down. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Its been 3 days since I got kidnapped just let me work!!!!!

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

Sometimes I really really hate being gay. I just wanna run my hand threw his hair and cuddle him at night :((( why am I like thiiissss

Abbs @abbykeener

Harls stop being a little bitch and ask him out. 

Harls @potatoguns

Don't swear at me! I'll ground you. 

Abbs @abbykeener

Just ask him out. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm soo tireeeedddd. And idk why. Nfjrirjfji hope y'all enjoyed the chapter.


	15. Chapter 15

Peter @officalSIintern

Do you ever wear your binder for like 12 hours and when you finally take it out your like. 'Oh this is what it feels like to breathe' cause mood. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Why are you wearing your binder for 12 hours???? I'm updating Friday and Karen so they alert me when you were it to long! Don't make me cut it off of you!

Harls @potatoguns

He also will complain about not being able to breathe and won't take it out. Like a dumb. He also complaind about his aids hurting but 'i wanna hear the show harls' we have SUBTITLES 

Peter @officalSIintern

ITS NOT THE SAME HARLS!!

Cli(n)t @hawkeye

It is definitely not the same. 

Harls @potatoguns

Ughhh

~~~

Two losers + MJ

MJ: i got a love letter in my locker.

Ned: Wait…. Really??? From who

MJ: signed your secret lesbian admirer

Peter: aww I wish Harls and I were in school so I give him secret notes. 

MJ: who do you think its from?

Peter: well. Someoje in are grade. Who's a lesbian. 

Ned: Cindy is gay??

MJ: Cindy and i would be a power couple. 

Peter: very true. 

Ned: I want a secret admirer :(

Peter: same. 

MJ: youre dating Spider-man Pete. 

Peter: I am Spider-man. 

Ned: is that like???? Masturbation

~~~

Abbs @abbykeener

I love conspiracering with my dumb brothers crushes friends. I know exactly what you need to do to get your crush on a date. 

Harls @potatoguns 

Thats like wrong on so many levels Abby. 

Abbs @abbykeener

And? 

~~~

Abby to Harley

Abby: figure out to be a secret admirer. 

Harley: we live next to each other how can I do that. 

Abby: okay. So Pete's is Spider-man. Right?

Harley: yes….

Abby: so graffiti????

Harley: WHAT?

Abby: dont act like your a goody two shoes. I know you used to do art all over rose hill. 

Harley: yea you right. But how will that get his attention. 

Abby: Petey loves art. Do it in a spot he's at often. Write. 'Spidey I love your muscles' or something on a wall all pretty like. Sign it. 'Secret Admirer'

Harley: you're to smart. 

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

I'd prefer your love notes don't come in illegal street art. But thank you! (picture of a wall with 'Youre so amazing Spidey! From your secret admirer.' )

Peter @officalSIintern

Aww that's so sweet tho. Your fans love you so much :) 

~~~

Dad to Peter

Dad: do you ever get tired of flirting with yourself

Peter: yes. 

Peter: I was actually thinking about coming out… On my birthday. 

Dad: thats in 4 months… 

Peter: I am aware.

Dad: I doubt you'll be abpe to keep a secret for that long. 

Peter: thanks dad. 

~~~

Ned @NedFlanders

Sometimes I go over to like. Build Lego's with Pete. Completely forgetting that he ya know lives with the avengers. And then Clint drops from the fucking vents and reminds me. 

Peter @officalSIintern

MJ almost died when she met Pepper and Nat. So I mean. Better then that?

MJ @imbusyreading

They're what I want to be. 

Peter @officalSIintern

You're already a powerful scary lesbian tho???? 

MJ @imbusyreading

Honestly. Thanks for the confidence boost. 

NR @BlackWidow

Its true MJ. I'll ask Pep if she can get you an internship. 

Peter @officalSIintern

MJ just called ned and I crying. She never… Shows this much emotion I am scared. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope y'all enjoy the chapter! It was not edited at all and I am sorry. 
> 
> This is my red bubble store. Pls buy something so I have money and can go meet my girlfriend pls. I wanna hug her :(  
> https://www.redbubble.com/people/LizzyLynnn/shop?asc=u


	16. Chapter 16

Peter @officalSIintern

Do you ever wear your binder for like 12 hours and when you finally take it out your like. 'Oh this is what it feels like to breathe' cause mood. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Why are you wearing your binder for 12 hours???? I'm updating Friday and Karen so they alert me when you were it to long! Don't make me cut it off of you!

Harls @potatoguns

He also will complain about not being able to breathe and won't take it out. Like a dumb. He also complaind about his aids hurting but 'i wanna hear the show harls' we have SUBTITLES 

Peter @officalSIintern

ITS NOT THE SAME HARLS!!

Cli(n)t @hawkeye

It is definitely not the same. 

Harls @potatoguns

Ughhh

~~~

_ Two losers + MJ _

MJ: i got a love letter in my locker.

Ned: Wait…. Really??? From who

MJ: signed your secret lesbian admirer

Peter: aww I wish Harls and I were in school so I give him secret notes. 

MJ: who do you think its from?

Peter: well. Someoje in are grade. Who's a lesbian. 

Ned: Cindy is gay??

MJ: Cindy and i would be a power couple. 

Peter: very true. 

Ned: I want a secret admirer :(

Peter: same. 

MJ: youre dating Spider-man Pete. 

Peter: I am Spider-man. 

Ned: is that like???? Masturbation

~~~

Abbs @abbykeener

I love conspiracering with my dumb brothers crushes friends. I know exactly what you need to do to get your crush on a date. 

Harls @potatoguns 

Thats like wrong on so many levels Abby. 

Abbs @abbykeener

And? 

~~~

Abby to Harley

Abby: figure out to be a secret admirer. 

Harley: we live next to each other how can I do that. 

Abby: okay. So Pete's is Spider-man. Right?

Harley: yes….

Abby: so graffiti????

Harley: WHAT?

Abby: dont act like your a goody two shoes. I know you used to do art all over rose hill. 

Harley: yea you right. But how will that get his attention. 

Abby: Petey loves art. Do it in a spot he's at often. Write. 'Spidey I love your muscles' or something on a wall all pretty like. Sign it. 'Secret Admirer'

Harley: you're to smart. 

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

I'd prefer your love notes don't come in illegal street art. But thank you! (picture of a wall with 'Youre so amazing Spidey! From your secret admirer.' )

Peter @officalSIintern

Aww that's so sweet tho. Your fans love you so much :) 

~~~

Dad to Peter

Dad: do you ever get tired of flirting with yourself

Peter: yes. 

Peter: I was actually thinking about coming out… On my birthday. 

Dad: thats in 4 months… 

Peter: I am aware.

Dad: I doubt you'll be abpe to keep a secret for that long. 

Peter: thanks dad. 

~~~

Ned @NedFlanders

Sometimes I go over to like. Build Lego's with Pete. Completely forgetting that he ya know lives with the avengers. And then Clint drops from the fucking vents and reminds me. 

Peter @officalSIintern

MJ almost died when she met Pepper and Nat. So I mean. Better then that?

MJ @imbusyreading

They're what I want to be. 

Peter @officalSIintern

You're already a powerful scary lesbian tho???? 

MJ @imbusyreading

Honestly. Thanks for the confidence boost. 

NR @BlackWidow

Its true MJ. I'll ask Pep if she can get you an internship. 

Peter @officalSIintern

MJ just called ned and I crying. She never… Shows this much emotion I am scared. 

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I feel old. 

Rhodey @honeybear

If your old then I'm old and I don't want to be old. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

You are old platypus. 

Rhodey @honeybear

:( id say sleep on the couch but your old and that would fuck up your back. 

Peter @officalSIintern

They're glaring at each other across the table. I'm just trying to eat breakfast :(((

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

My sister. Is a monster. I raised her. Why is she like this!

Abbs @abbykeener

Payback bitch

Harls @potatoguns

For what! Cooking you dinner for 10 years? Taking custody of you since Ma is in PRISON. Raises you! I changed your diapers!!!! 

Abbs @abbykeener

Remember when you made your first potato gun. And fucking shot me in the head! 

Harls @potatoguns

:(((

Peter @officalSIintern

Sometimes I wish I had siblings. And then they interact in any way/shape/form and I realize. Only child is the best way to live. 

Rhodey @honeybear

Damn. So no adopting another kid?

Peter @officalSIintern

I mean. if you wanna. But thw last time i ever 'had siblings' was foster care. And bleh. 

~~~

Cap. @SteveRogers

Sometimes I hate having roommates. 

Bucky Barnes @jesus

What happened this time? 

Cap. @SteveRogers

Tony ate all the blueberries :(

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Not sorry. 

Cap. @SteveRogers

I'm stealing your money. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Just ask FRIDAY where it is. 

~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

Dad just give uncle Steve money. But when I ask for an allowance rise I get a no. You're a billionaire dad. 

Harls @potatoguns

You get like $200 a week?????? 

Peter @officalSIintern

Lego's are expensive! And Ned and I have Saturday building day! 

Harls @potatoguns

Can I join? 

Peter @officalSIintern

If you wanna listen to me rant about how testosterone is effecting me go for it 

Harls @potatoguns

Totally!

~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I told Pete to take a nap (he was up late with Spidey and is cranky) and. He told me uno reverse???? I'm confused. 

MJ @imbusyreading 

Stark. You need to work on your gen z language

Lizzie @theauthor:)

My store is linked if you wanna check it out :) please I wanna meet my girlfriend. And need money for that.

https://www.redbubble.com/people/LizzyLynnn/shop?asc=u


	17. Chapter 17

MJ @imbusyreading

Why are almost all the people I work with old white sexist racist men? Like,,, I was actually called 'hey black girl' today! (Yes I reported it)

SaltnPep @pepperpotts

I get people like that all the time. I will make sure he is fired btw. 

NR @blackwidow

Michelle, want to come train with me? I'll teach you how to throw a punch. 

MJ @imbusyreading

Hell yea. I'm gonna punch all the racists. 

~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

MJ is know more scary. Auntie Nat had me spar with her and shes honestly insane. 

MJ @imbusyreading

Learning from the best. 

Peter @officalSIintern

She trained me too! Her and Bucky! 

MJ @imbusyreading

Lesbian power. 

Peter @officalSIintern

What does that even mean???

~~~

Rhodey @honeybear

My son is turning 17 in 3 weeks. And I feel old

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I feel old too. Ugh. I've only known Pete for 5 years but damn. I love our son. 

Peter @officalSIintern

You still have a month. Stop being sappy. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

No. I'm being sappy. Come watch movies with your pops and I. 

Peter @officalSIintern

But…. Im like really close to finishing this!!! 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Karens tweetng for you? Im gonna come lookbat your project. 

~~~

7phds @brucebanner

Tony called me to come look at Pete's project…. He made a new element. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

I'm just asking confused as you. 

Peter @officalSIintern

Are y'all actually surprised? I mean. I make spider silk, on a regular basis. I just. Wanted to make something strong enough to bounce bullets. So…. I did.

Stank @youknowwhoiam

This is my son people. 

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Hey y'all. I'm gonna slowly give hints to my identity. Because I can. 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

Pete totally destroyed our lab :(

Peter @officalSIintern

WE CAN TEST THE ROOMBAS NOW

Harls @potatoguns

Omg. Yessss. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

These children…. (Video of 'roombas' cleaning the floors and climbing the walls To clean them and some on the ceiling) 

Harls @potatoguns

We figured out how to get roombas to clean the ceiling. Want some for your lab?

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Yes please. 

~~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Hey y'all your favorite friendly neighborhood deaf boi. (First hint hehe uwu)

MemeQueen @shuri

I can't believe you're doing an identity tease smh white boy. 

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Been a week since my last tease post :P this week. Im almost 17. And I've been adopted more then once 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Smh

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Y'all already know my name. You know who I am. Most just haven't connected those final dots. Think about it. Reveal in a week and a half. 

~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

Hehe making dad and pops feel old. A video comp. Thanks Friday and Karen. Best AIs ever. (Video 1: Tony and Rhodey coming up threw the elevator. Harley, Pete, Abby,Shuri,Ned and MJ, were all sitting in the living room playing Mario Kart. The adults stop and watched for a second. Need had one the round anf Pete had gotten second. "You know what Ned!" Pete yelled standing up. "I DONT CARE THAT YOU BROKE YOUR ELBOW." 

Tony and Rhodey looked confused. And slowly left the room. 

Video 2: Tony and Pete 'driving' (friday is in control of the car) "ugh theirs construction" tony groans. 

"Road work ahead? Uh. Yea i sure hope it does" 

"Listen. Pete. I know you love puns. But that is the worst joke I've ever heard you say." 

"Its a vine Dad! "

  
  


Video 3: "Pete. Peter. Slow down. How do you have this much energy!" Rhodey shouts at peter who's running around the penthouse. 

"I honestly dont know i only slept for 25 minutes!" 

Out of no where Harley and Abby joins and they start playing tag. 

"Damn kids." Rhodey mumbles under his breathe.)

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Yea yea yea. We're old I get it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The road work ahead part is based on a conversation I had with my mom lol. Yes. This is a killer chapter. Next chapter.... The reveal. Or more then just one thing >:)))))


	18. Chapter 18

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Reveal in a week y'all. Todays hint is (drum roll pls) I constantly get in trouble for binding well crime fighting

~~~

Virgil @minnowshadow

How do you feel about spideys reveal? @officalSIintern

Peter @officalSIintern

I'm really really happy for him! And nervous. Cause… Yea. 

~~~

Slytherbuddy @slytherinnugget7

I'm so excited for Spideys reveallll just 5 more days y'all

Spidey @Spider-Pan

Yup 5 days!!! 

~~~

NR @blackwidow

Spidey needs to stop making web nests in the kitchen! 

Spidey @Spider-Pan

I'll stop making web nests when Clint stops vent snooping. 

Cli(n)t @hawkeye

Never. 

Spidey @Spider-Pan

There's your answer Auntie. 

~~~

Peter @officalSIintern

Shuri is coming Over!!!!!!!!!! 

MJ @imbusyreading

Ned and I are to. But nooo you only care about Shuri

Peter @officalSIintern

You live like. A few minutes away. She lives on the other side of the world. 

Needles @NedFlanders

Point. But I haven't seen you in likkkkeeee a week.

Peter @officalSIintern

You were over yesterday????

Stank @youknowwhoiam

They're just being dramatic. 

~~~

MemeQueen @shuri

Hehe I'm back in America. Time to create havoc. 

Rhodey @honeybear

Just not in the penthouse. 

MemeQueen @shuri

I'm only gonna listen to this because its you and not Tony. 

~~~

MoonMoon @Moonbreak8

Guysss spidey reval tomorrow!!!! 

maxattacks @maxmayhem5

Any one else hardcore trying to figure it out before he tells us?

LokiStan @Lokiandlokittyareawesome

I'm Betting its harley or peter. 

UwU @hellsite

I don't think it could be peter have you seen him? He doesn't have like any muscles. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam

Can y'all stop making theories and just be patient?

~~~

Spidey @Spider-Pan

I hope you all are excited for my reveal later. But first. Its Peters birthday! 17!! (I'm totally stealing his spotlight for today :P) 

  
  


Spidey @Spider-Pan

Happy birthday Peter! (A picture of a very tired looking Peter, with awful bed-head, sitting at a table, a stack of pancakes in front of him. 

Peter @officalSIintern

Shh to early for all these notifications. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super short chapter I'm sorry. But I am tired. And have writers block. All I wanna do RN is watch Minecraft let's plays. Hope you enjoyed :)


	19. Chapter 19

Spidey @Spider-Pan

I wanna thank MJ for proof reading my cards.

MJ @imbusyreading

No problem loser. 

**_The Press Conference (well leading up to it)_ **

Peter paced back and forth in his room. Going up the walls, on the ceiling, he needed all the pacing room he could get. 

_ Oh gods. What do i wear? What if I get negative backlash? Oh gods.  _ His thoughts spiraled in his head to the point he didn't even notice Rhodey walk in. 

"Pete, Pete. C'mon. Get off the ceiling. It makes me nervous." 

"No."

"Alright. But, I made food come eat then get ready."

"Fine."

~~~

Peter wore his Spider-Suit and 'patiently' waited for his cue. 

~~~

"Hello. You all know who I am. And we all know why you're here. A little spider has a special announcement." Tony announced.

Peter walked on and cringed at the lights and sound. 

"Uh. Hey everyone! So…" He pulled out a stack of idea cards. " So you are all here because I'm revealing my identity. Which thank you all for coming by the way. Uh I wanna thank MJ for proof reading my cards. So. Let's go." He reached up and pulled his mask off. "Hi! I'm Peter Stark! And i feel I have some explaining to do. So you all obviously know of me already i started as dad's intern and then a series of unfortunate events happened and I somehow ended up his and Pops son. Which I love. They literally are the best parents in the world. And I've had three sets I think I know what I'm saying. They've stayed up with me during nightmares, even when they had work in the morning. They've listened to me rant about crushes. And helped me transition and helped with my aids. Everything."

Peter pauses and looks over at his dad's smiling at them. 

"Now that I've ranted about my amazing dads. I know all of you are questioning me dating myself. Which was not my idea! But, was a great way to keep my identity a secret. So my friend MJ came up with this idea, and made the post about it. And my other friend Needs, hacked my Spidey account to confirm it. Now no I'm not dating myself. I honestly want to date Harls. Wait….. FUCK! MJ WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO!" 

Peter ran as fast as he could offstage, to the outside and started swinging away. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorey this is so short! And so late. I had freinds over since we all start at different schools on Monday. And one of them lives 3 hours away so I figured id hang out with them instead of writing. But hopw you enjoy :))) I love y'all


	20. Chapter 20

AshKetchum @CheshireAsh

Oml MJ be doing gods work. 

Mood @DreamyWriter2003

Honestly. Harls go get your mans

ButIGot @Water_Meh_Lone

MJ is a goddess how'd she manage to pull that off

LucyLoo @Lucy Caulfield

I aspire to be as amazing as Michelle Jones. 

Kendra^-^ @KendraDhyanna

The way Peter talks about his parents is so sweet! 

Sims @VerraSims

It truly truly is. And they both look so proud of their son. 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

What. 

Harls @potatoguns

The. 

Harls @potatoguns

Fuck. 

Harls @potatoguns

The man I've been crushing on simce I fucking moved to new york! Wants to date me. And I cant fucking find!

Harls @potatoguns

People of Twitter, be creepy! Hunt him down and tell me where he is! 

Leah @da wife

He's been scene swinging around in queens. 

Harls @potatoguns

Lucky me. I have an iron man suit. Brb. 

~~~

Harley got into his Armor and started flying around in Queens. He didn't know the area very well. He kept his eyes out for Peter. "Peter? Peter" Harley yelled looking for him. 

It took Harley and hour of flying around to find the boy. 

"Peter? Wanna talk?" Harley asked well landed on the roof. 

"Why? I know how you feel." He looked sad and upset. I hate this, why didn't I tell him sooner?? 

"Do you actually?"

"Yes! You probably hate me! I'm just some gross trans kid, why would I think you'd wanna date me?"

"You're not gross. And I don't care if your trans. You're Peter. You're Spider-man. Check my twitter. Seriously." 

~~~(that was awful because I suck at writing haha oof )

Peter @officalSIintern

@potatoguns fucking just instead of being normal "yes I wanna date you" he told me "check twitter" smh

Harls @potatoguns

You got the idea. 

Peter @officalSIintern

Yes. Know. When's our date ? 

Harls @potatoguns. 

…. Give me a good 45 minutes to plan this. 

~~~~

Stank @youknowwhoiam

My children are idiots. 

Rhodey @honeybear

Our children sweetheart. And i agree. Now let's help Harls plan a date. 

~~~

Harls to peter

Harls: okay. So??? Picnic in central Park tomorrow I'm making all the food RN Tonys told me all the stuff you don't like/are allergic to. And after ward going to the animal shelter. The one you gice the pets you find on patrol. And cuddling/playing with the animals.

Peter: that….. Sounds amazing. Thank you Harls. <3 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I start school on Monday and I'm excited. But also not. Because I'm online but I wanna see my friends :( we've decided to video chat at lunch but its not gonna be the same.


	21. Chapter 21

Peter @officalSIintern

Should I change my @ ?

NR @blackwidow

You're not an intern anymore so it would make sense to. 

Stank @youknowwhoiam 

I have an idea….. Family group chat RN

~~~

_ Best Dads and Son _

Dad: we need matching @ on twitter. 

Pops: Honey… 

Pops: isn't that cringey

Pete: We need! Pops please!

Pops: only because you used your manners 

Dad: okay so obviously. I'm IronDad 

Pete: SpiderSon?

Dad: yes. James. Pick a name. 

Pops: uhhhhhh

Pops: pete help me. 

Pete: well your also IronDad but dad picked that. IronPops? IronHusband? IronDad 2.0? Idk. Im trying. 

Dad: IronPops sounds like candy and your sweet like candy. So I like that one. 

Pops: Thanks honey. 

Pete: ewwww gross

~~~

Peter @SpiderSon

Guys guys new user! Me and my dads match! 

Stank @IronDad

It was my idea. I take full credit. 

Rhodey @IronPops

Well. You can't take it all. Pete came up with my name. 

Peter @SpiderSon 

I did!!! 

Harls @potatoguns

Stop procrastinating. Go get ready for our date. 

Peter @SpiderSon 

But…. I don't know what to wear! 

Harls @potatoguns

*sigh* omw to your room 

~~~

Peter @SpiderSon

I'm going on a date! 

Harls @potatoguns 

You sang a song and did a dance about it to :) 

Peter @SpiderSon

I know you recorded it. Spidey sense. ~~~

(I feel like I cant actually write so I'm not going to)

Peter @SpiderSon

Best date ever :) 

cli(n)t @hawkeye

Only date you've ever been on. 

Peter @SpiderSon

Rude. 

NR @blackwidow

Tell your Spider Mama all about it :) 

Peter @SpiderSon

So we had a picnic and he made all my fave and then we went to the animal shelter and played with puppys :) 

NR @blackwidow

Did he give you a kiss?

Harls @potatoguns

Yes. I have him a kiss ;) 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was my first day of school today. And I'm online. And I accidentally did 3 days of work today but I need to be logged on 6 hours a day. Oops.


	22. Chapter 22

Peter @SpiderSon

Fuck stark lives. 

Stank @IronDad

What did I do? 

Peter @SpiderSon

My initials are known PBS fucking PBS

Harls @potatoguns

Babe. Its fine. 

Peter @SpiderSon

Meh

~~~

MJ @imbusyreading

I've been getting a hate because of the press conference and let me tell you. I don't care. Stop wasting your energy messaging me. 

Peter @SpiderSon

I'm actually very thankful for MJ and what she did. She knew Harls liked me back and also knew niether of us would ever confess. So. Stop it. 

Neddie @NedFlanders

We were sick of the pinning. 

Peter @SpiderSon

Yea cause I domt have to hear about y'all crushes/girlfriend *eye roll*

Neddie @NedFlanders

Lol yea MJ I don't rant about my girlfriend

MJ @imbusyreading

You're a flaming Homosexual Ned

Neddie @NedFlanders

Yes and? 

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

I just got the shovel talk from all the avengers. "You're also my kid. But don't hurt my kid. You got that Keener?" Tony Stark

Harls @potatoguns

And Nat and Pep were literally so scary. Nat could kill me. Pep could ruin my entire life. 

Peter @SpiderSon

Don't be to scared of them. 

Harls @potatoguns

But they're scary! 

~~~

Rhodey @IronPops

Tones made a thingy on FRIDAY (our AI) and made it so we'd know if the boys were in each others rooms. They managed to hack her. 

Stank @IronDad

They're smart. Idk how to make it so they'll not be gross horny teens tho. 

NR @blackwidow

Just buy them lube. 

Peter @SpidetSon

Djcieiejeidifsjicjdis 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm tired. School is gross. I'm like a week ahead. And o wanna sleep


	23. Chapter 23

Peter @SpiderSon

My dads are mega helicopter parents. 

Squish @squishychiminie

They let you fight crime? 

Peter @SpiderSon

But I'm not allowed to go spend the night at Ned's. 

Rhodey @IronPops

He's welcome to come over here. 

Peter @SpiderSon

:(

~~~

Harls @potatoguns

Sometimes my sister drives me crazy

Abbs @abbykeener

Haha same to you

Better Hawkeye @lucky_katebishop

You haven't been active much lately??? 

Abbs @abbykeener

Haha yea Author (aka God) kinda forgot my existence in this universe. 

Rawr x3 @disasterpansexual

Why are people being so cryptic today? 

~~~

BW @blackwidow

Anyone else felt off and tired this weekend? 

Cli(n)t @hawkeye

Yea. I wonder why. 

PanPool @DeadPool

It's like the author has lost interest in this story and ship. 

Peter @SpiderSon

DP why must you talk this way. 

~~~~

Hehe…. I completely lost interest in this book. And that sucks. But it's also life. So. I mean. Yea. Thank y'all so much for reading. I have other books too. My next one will probably be ned/MJ/Peter because I think it's super cute and have ideas and yea. Bye for now people:-) 


End file.
